No Filter

I teach children - little ones ranging from the ages of 7 and 8.  They are very funny, and I laugh daily at the things they say or do.  They also have absolutely no filter and will oftentimes say exactly what they are thinking.  I have experienced this many times throughout my teaching career, and I usually can handle these no filter moments rather well.  Or, I thought I could until today.  I am not sure why this no filter moment caught me off guard and made me tear up.  Maybe it was because it came from one of my quietest, sweetest girls?  Maybe it was because I am extra sensitive right now?  Or, maybe because it is true?

This is what happened.  It was a beautiful day outside at recess.  I was actually excited about having duty to get out into the sunshine and maybe play some kickball (my favorite thing to do at recess).  As soon as I walked out to recess, a first grader came up to me and handed me the biggest bouquet of dandelions I have ever seen that she had picked for me.  Pretty awesome, right?  I was making my rounds and checking in on some kids when one of my girls came running up to me.  She said, "Here you go, Miss Whisman.  I brought you a jump rope so you could exercise.  You are chubby."

Um...thanks?  How do you even respond to that?  My eyes immediately filled with tears but thank goodness I was wearing dark sunglasses so she didn't see.  I am not even sure what I said to her, but I must have mumbled some sort of reply because she ran away and enjoyed the rest of her recess.  I spent the rest of mine circulating the playground and trying not to burst into tears.

It is bad enough that I battle these own thoughts on my own.  I also just assume that others think them about me.  But to have one of my sweet, innocent children vocalize insecurities about myself in a public forum like a playground was just not what I needed today or any day really.

I didn't break down and cry.  I didn't come in from recess and stuff my sorrows with junk like I could.  Instead I signed up for Warrior Dash, skipped all food items at spring party today, and have the sudden urge to go run...for the rest of the night. 

And, here is a picture of my dandelion bouquet.